Trust?

Trust is such a loaded word. So many people take it for granted. It is a part of every relationship and friendship, either by there being trust or there not being trust. The lack of or presence of trust has a huge impact.

I don't trust people. It's not easy to say that. It may not be easy for people who know me to read that. I don't like that about myself. But, I'm aware of it. It is more a reflection of me than others. I could work to change that. It wouldn't be easy to change. Things happen in life that engrave certain things in you. Sadly, things have happened to make me not trust people. I'm amazed at how much a select few situations with certain people can have such a profound impact.

Realizing this, it's a reminder to me that we never know what situations we're in or people we're going to impact or what/who is going to impact us. We need to be mindful of what kind path we're helping to build for people in our lives. Are we leading others toward a path where they cannot embrace life and have healthy relationships with others or are we encouraging others to embrace themselves and the others in their lives at whatever point in life they may be at?

Though I've been the one affected negatively by certain situations and people in my life, I hope I am able to use the lessons learned to help others around me embrace themselves and their relationships with people to enjoy life. There's no time like the present and I want to be a part of something good and help others do the same.

To me, one of the hardest things is learning to trust yourself. I struggle with this. We all make decisions that may have unwanted results. Part of the journey of life is learning to trust yourself to make the decisions that you believe are the best ones. And another part of that journey is learning to trust yourself again after you've made decisions with unwanted results. I am learning to trust myself again but it is not easy. It also becomes easy to get angry with myself or sad over the effects of the decisions already made. Life is about learning to recognize the decisions and just keep going. I can't change what happened but I can change how I respond to that decision and its results. I can let it cripple me or I can let it teach me the next time I am faced with a choice.

I struggle with trust. Trust in others and trust in myself. So I wonder, do other people struggle with trusting others or themselves?